The Spell of Religion

An Ally’s Plea For Reconciliation

2010-12-27T15:48:00.000-08:00

Am I a lesbian? No. Am I a Mormon? Again – no – but I used to be. Do I have a gay child? No. But I am a proud GLBT Ally and member of the Orange County, CA PFLAG Chapter (Parents Friends and Families of Lesbians and Gays) as well as being part of their Speakers Bureau. We go into Colleges, Universities and High Schools (when requested by the teachers and professors) to educate students about the GLBT population and to dispel any myths they might have. It’s the most rewarding volunteer job I’ve ever had.

Now…for a little of my history and how I came to be an ally for the GLBT community.

The first really close gay friend I had was, Frank L, a film maker and a wonderful human being. In 2000, Proposition 22 was introduced in California, and the church I was deeply involved in at the time became openly involved in politics for the very first time (to my knowledge.) Youth leaders had asked my children to hand out flyers and post signs in yards to support Prop 22, which was called The CA Defense of Marriage Act. When I found out its purpose was to ensure that gay marriage would never be legalized in California – I was stunned.

I thought about my friend Frank, and wondered how him being able to legally marry would hurt anyone? I wondered how him having all the benefits of marriage would threaten straight marriage? I couldn’t come up with one single rational reason – the concept just boggled my mind. Unfortunately, Prop 22 passed with an overwhelming majority of people believing that Frank just didn’t quite deserve the word marriage. How could they decide that – they didn’t even know Frank - or most of those whom they had just reduced to 2nd class citizens? This reality caused such a conflict within me I eventually left the Mormon Church.

My gay-rights activism didn’t really begin though until Prop 8, which was introduced in 2008 after the Supreme Court of California overturned Prop 22 on the grounds it was unconstitutional. Watching the joy spread across the state as 18,000 same sex couples were joined in holy matrimony between May and November caused me to weep tears of joy. Then the election on November 4, 2008 changed all of that. Again, but by a much smaller majority, some people had convinced themselves that gay-marriage was a threat to straight marriage - and possibly to civilization as we know it. They took those misguided concerns to the ballot box – an action which caused much pain and hurt between families and friends and divided a nation.

Although Frank had since moved to Italy where he is in a loving stable same-sex relationship with his life partner, the gay community here in the U.S. was made to feel as if their lives were a lie, their births a mistake, and the very people who were supposed to love and honor them had turned their backs on them once again because of their sexual orientation – a minuscule part of what really defines them as human beings.

I’m trying to come to terms with how the church that I had once loved had convinced its members to turn their backs on so many of their own. How could they truly believe that God had made a mistake in about 5-10 % of the human population? How will committed gay couples getting all the same federal and state benefits associated with marriage threaten straight couples in any way? Don’t they want their members to be moral and celibate until marriage? Wouldn’t they rather encourage them to be in committed relationships? What do those who are only attracted to their same gender do if marriage is not an option? How do they reconcile their faith, with their love? How do we as followers of Christ justify this intolerance toward sons and daughters of God? No church will ever be forced to marry anyone who doesn’t abide by their precepts. I can’t get married in a Jewish Synagogue unless I convert to Judaism, and no one unworthy can ever marry in the Mormon temple. But to deny gay couples the right to marry anywhere, seems completely misguided to me.

My deepest prayer is that those who somehow see gay-marriage as a threat to the moral fabric of our society can come full circle in their thinking and realize that creating laws forbidding same sex couples from marrying legally won’t make them stop loving and being attracted to members of their own sex, nor will it make them more moral. What it does accomplish is to make them lonely, confused, rejected and often times driven to dangerous promiscuity and even suicide.

Reconciliation is only possible if we take the time to understand. Understanding can only occur when we are willing to think through both sides of this issue and consider the consequences of what anti-gay propositions do to real live humans.

I gratefully acknowledge those who are striving to open hearts and minds by clear and heartfelt dialogue through reconciliation. May the spirit of peace and compassion sweep through us – allowing us to know the truth and act accordingly.

Dan Savage

2010-08-27T16:17:00.000-07:00

"I have no beef with evangelical Christians who support full civil equality for gays and lesbians despite believing that gay sex is a sin. Heck, I'll personally mow the lawns of evangelical Christians who refrain from actively persecuting gays and lesbians. I've said that the gay rights movement shouldn't get into arguments about theology and that people have a right to their own beliefs. I frankly don't care if someone thinks I'm going to hell after death and I'm not going to argue with him for the same reason I'm not going to argue with someone who believes that I'm going to the lost continent of Atlantis after dinner."

"All gays and lesbians want from evangelical Christians is the same deal the Jews and the yoga instructors and the atheists and the divorced and the adulterers and the rich all get: full civil equality despite the going-to-hell business. (And isn't hell punishment enough? Do we have to be persecuted here on earth too? It's almost as if they don't trust God to persecute us after we die. Have a little faith, people!)"

Dan Savage:

Been a Long Time

2010-06-21T16:53:00.000-07:00

I stopped updating this blog because it was making me crazy. Equality for the GLBT community just seems like such a no-brainer to me. The more I debate with people who pushed, and continue to push, the withholding of state and federal benefit from loving gay couples, the angrier I get at religion. I know that there are some within that camp who are not religious, that for whatever reason can't support gay marriage. But the majority of those pushing the anti-gay rhetoric are from religious conservative America and have simply followed the stance their church leaders "suggested" they take.

I highly doubt that many of these same people who voted down gay rights, or helped man phone banks or handed out fliers in support of "traditional" marriage, would have even noticed if suddenly gay people were legally married. I doubt they would have given millions of dollars collectively, to deny gay couples benefits for themselves and their families if their churches hadn't suggested they do. I doubt they would be screaming today that our society is in peril and on its way to annihilation because gay couples now have all the same tax benefits as heterosexuals.

Interesting what our imaginations can do when we are fed misinformation by organizations who lead through fear.

The Mourning After the Election

2009-11-04T13:10:00.000-08:00

Nothing can assuage the collective disappointment felt by so many gay couples and their allies around the nation, as once again the meaning of equality has escaped the mental arsenal of the ill-informed. I’m talking about the ballot initiative, Question 1, in Maine, designed to overturn the law which was recently signed by Governor Baldacci there, granting same-sex couples the right to marry.

Governor Baldacci had an epiphany; one of those “aha” moments when he realized how cruel and discriminatory it is to deny gay couples the right to marry. After once opposing same-sex marriage, he finally realized the error of his ways. He made his epiphany a matter of public record in a press conference. The GLBT community and their allies owe him our gratitude, even though this time, his, and our efforts, weren’t quite enough to solidify marriage equality in Maine.

But on the other end of the spectrum there’s still this argument: Of course, gays have equality; all they need to do to fully realize that equality is live inauthentic lives as heterosexuals, be willing to marry someone for whom they have no sexual attraction, and agree to forego any real joy in this life, with the promise of a reward in heaven for their sacrifice. Is that too much to ask? Maggie Gallagher, the leader of The National Organization for Marriage (NOM) and her brood don't seem to think so. And neither do so many others on the right. “Every person has an equal right to marry someone of the opposite sex” they keep telling me. And nothing I say seems to crack that idiotic misconception.

What are basic human rights? A few are: Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness – Equal protection under the law - Freedom from the whims of the majority being imposed on any minority - The right to religious liberty. Some religious leaders are outraged that they can’t legally perform a marriage between same sex couple because that right has been stripped from them. These are the most basic rights promised to all tax paying and law abiding citizens by our Country’s Constitution.

Humanity is a collection of survivors riding on this planet called earth in the Milky Way galaxy trying to find meaning in it all. That’s no easy feat, so I concede that those who use religion as their justification for discrimination often do so with the best of intentions. They believe our sole purpose is to serve an invisible god, who ironically in their mind requires us to judge and reprimand those who don’t fall into lock-step with right-wing ideology. They’ve been taught that homosexuality is a sin, and thus, gays must be punished if they don’t become straight, and they should never be granted equal status if they live a “gay” lifestyle.

Or there are those guys who bombed the Twin Towers screaming their religious verbiage while murdering thousands of people, all while envisioning the seven virgins they would soon be joining in heaven. But this isn’t about them. This is about the terrorists in our own country masquerading as God’s soldiers, doing His work by making the polling place a place where each person can become judge, jury and, in some cases, executioner. Ballot measures that promote homophobia have been responsible for not only suicides, but also murders. Two cases in point – Stuart Matis and Matthew Shepherd.

I wonder if the day after the election, those who voted to deprive gay couples of equality, felt joy equal in intensity to the pain they have caused. As they went through their day, did they ever stop to reflect on this victory, and did they feel more secure in their own marriages now that gay couples in Maine cannot share that title with them? Will their families be safer now, protected from the ills of society like they were back in 2000/2001 when we elected a fundamentalist Christian President, and voted to prohibit gay couples in CA the right to legally marry? Oh, I forgot. God didn’t rain his blessings down on us as a nation when we took those steps back then did he? In fact, the worst terrorist attack to ever hit American soil occurred shortly after the religious right made their intentions known at the ballot box. Wasn’t that God’s queue to shower his blessing down upon the holy ones? Weren’t their actions in alignment with His will?

Their efforts to save humanity from what they perceived as the evil liberal and gay agenda didn’t work then, did it? And it certainly isn’t working now. But some continue doing the same thing over and over hoping to achieve a different result - without ever contemplating the possibility that maybe, just maybe, they are wrong.
When will we stop being afraid of those who we think are not like us and join together as one people and one planet to address the bigger issues; homelessness, health-care-for-all, global warming, poverty, inequity, injustice, hatred, bigotry, and intolerance.

The hundreds of millions of dollars that have fed this campaign of intolerance toward our GLBT community over the years could have helped so many suffering humans. Children with few options could have slept in a comfortable bed, had a warm meal, a mentor to teach them to read. A woman afraid to go home to an abusive husband could have had more empowering alternatives. And the homeless GLBT youth who have been kicked to the curb by parents who find them an abomination could have had instead, loving arms to embrace them and accept them for exactly the beautiful human beings they really are.

Another 5 Star Review for The Spell of Religion

2009-11-04T10:26:00.000-08:00

Amazon.com
Ultimate courage, Ultimate honesty, October 26, 2009
By Roy T. Thorsen

Sheri Lawson has been a victim. She has also been a survivor. She,therefore,understands those who are being victimized and also recognizes those who are the victimizers,regardless of their cloak of sanctity or holiness. She presents a straight forward and objective discussion of how religious entities that have chosen to ignore one of the most basic admonitions of their own Leader to "judge not" have sought to deprive others of the blessings that their Creator surely would have wanted for them.

It took courage for a non-gay person to write this book and honesty to present it without a personal agenda. I recommend it to both those who agree and and those who disagree with gay marriage.

Jon Stewart's Interpretation of Glenn Beck - Brilliant!

2009-11-02T14:05:00.000-08:00

Opinion on Sarah Palin from an Ex- Governor of Alaska

2009-09-28T12:44:00.000-07:00

Shannon Moore of Alaska brings us commentary from Wally Hickel

Countdown with Lawrence O'Donnel-Rational Dialogue

2009-09-20T14:43:00.000-07:00

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Value Voters Summit-Rachel Maddow

2009-09-20T12:43:00.001-07:00

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Inequity for Gay Parents

2009-09-20T12:34:00.000-07:00

Unbelievable: As a Lesbian Mother, I Have to Pay More For Health Care

By Elizabeth G. Hines, Women's Media Center. Posted September 16, 2009.

Civil War at Hand?

2009-09-11T14:13:00.001-07:00

Rachel Maddow has uncovered a plot for Americans to literally take up arms and become violent in the hope of leading our country into another civil war. The most likely reason for this undercurrent...? An African American President.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

One of Keith Olbermann's Best

2009-09-02T12:23:00.000-07:00

Keith Olbermann exposes the lunacy over health care reform.

Exerpt from The Spell of Religion

2009-09-01T09:40:00.000-07:00

It is with the highest vibration of Love that I submit this work for your consideration. Once we can clearly see how misguided the notion is that our own personal beliefs give us permission to persecute others because we believe God condemns their actions, the sooner we will be able to look at everyone through more compassionate eyes and see their true souls--not the false image that religious dogma has perpetuated.

As has been vividly demonstrated over the centuries, souls who come into this world with same gender attraction have been persecuted, shunned, murdered and driven to suicide all in the name of God. The time has come to STOP the violence against our gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender brothers and sisters. The time has come to accept them in all their goodness and beauty as children of God. They are not different from us, they are part of us. Those who can make this shift in consciousness will be richer and more fulfilled because of it--I promise.

Truth has a path in the here and now and can only be arrived at with an open heart and mind. To be taught that we may never in this life completely understand the reason for our obedience to certain rules, and that it will all be revealed in the next, keeps us from following a logical path to truth and God. God is not illogical nor does He expect us to be. I love the basic premise for the book, A Course in Miracles, which is this; Nothing real can be threatened, Nothing unreal exists - Herein lies the peace of God.

Interractive Book Updates - Tell Me Your Thoughts

2009-07-25T11:28:00.000-07:00

After finally seeing my book in print, I discovered many things I could/should have said. My blog will help me do that. It will also be interactive where you can add comments of your own therefore giving fresh new perspectives on the issues. Please share your ideas so we can find more ways to turn misdirected hearts toward the true path of equality.

Although our society has far to go in gaining some kind of enlightenment, we have come a long way already. We have a moral compass that clearly lets us know when things are unacceptable, and the litmus test for that is, does it hurt another human being, do their actions break the laws of the land, and will the actions jeopardize the future of our planet? I can’t think of one single way that giving same gender couples all the legal benefits though marriage will hurt anyone. If you have a differing viewpoint, or would like to make your case for why you believe gays should not get the right to marry, feel free to comment, but please do so with respect without using the bible. We are a diverse culture and not everyone follows the bible.

What are your thoughts about this?

Links to Stores that Carry the Book

2009-07-24T13:00:00.000-07:00

Barnes & Noble

Amazon.com

Open Door Books in San Diego, CA

Changing Hearts

2009-07-19T10:21:00.000-07:00

At the San Diego Gay Pride Festival on Saturday July 18, 2009, which appropriately begins on Normal Street, I had the privilege of meeting a woman who found the power within to change a very important heart. Not that one heart is more important than another, of course, but someone with real power to make positive change for thousands of committed couples, including his own daughter. Marci Bair, a gay woman who has been in a committed relationship with her partner for over 25 years, is a woman whose fierce advocacy for equality allows her to put her money where her mouth is; she doesn't just play the victim game. I don't know all that she has done to make a positive difference in so many lives, but after learning about just a sampling of her efforts, I was exhausted just thinking about how much energy it takes to be that proactive. Her time is spent creating organizations, chairing committees, being on boards, all while holding down a full time job where she is also a member of the GLAM group (Gays Lesbians & Allies at MetLife.)

But out of all her successful efforts, one story moved me to tears. I'd already witnessed the outcome to this story after seeing the actual video on YouTube, but had no idea who the key players were in changing this man's heart. The Mayor of San Diego, Jerry Sanders, a Republican, had been an opponent of gay marriage and unmovable on his stance; even though he had a daughter who had come out to him as being gay and in a committed relationship. In late 2007 by a personal invitation from the mayor, Marci, along with several other advocates for equality came to his home to sit down and have a heart to heart talk about the issue since the City Council was soon to vote on the fate of equality in marriage for San Diego. Obviously the Mayor was torn over the issue since his decision had the potential to hurt is own daughter deeply.

After making her case before the Mayor, Marci and the others left not knowing whether or not their words had touched him. Marci felt they had. She truly believed that his heart had been changed. Proof that she was right soon came as a press conference was called and all major news stations across the country recorded one of the most moving moments in the history of the fight for equality among the GLBT community. This link tells the story of Marci and the meeting with the Mayor, and this link is the video that was seen around the country.

Like you said in the video, times have changed Mr Mayor, thanks to enlightened people like you. And thank you Marci, for believing enough that with truth, hearts really can be changed.

Hello

2009-05-30T20:32:00.000-07:00

Since I believe that ALL citizens should be treated equally and fairly, I have become an advocate for gay rights. Most posts will be related to this issue since it is such a heated topic right now. I may sneak a few other topics in from time to time, such as my communications with departed souls. Yes, you heard me right, I communicate with the dead. And lately I’ve been having some interesting conversations with a surprising advocate for gay rights. He was a great man in life, with many accomplishments for good to his credit, However, all the good he did in life is being overshadowed in death by his biggest mistake; writing Prop 22, which was like a stab in the heart to his gay son David. I’m speaking directly to the late Senator, William “Pete” Knight who died of Leukemia in 2004. He is a beautiful, delightful man, who simply wants to say, I’m sorry, David -- I love you.

Author's note: Since making this post Pete Knight has become silent. I can only assume that his unfinished business with David is now complete and he has moved on.

I have also had direct experience with the activation of my chakras and know with certainty these energy centers exist within our human bodies. When we understand them and pay attention to them they give our mind vital information regarding our own well being and sometimes the well being of those around us. My first conscious chakra experience possibly saved my husband Steve's life. I will do a post later on to explain this event.

Enjoy our journey; it’s great to have you on board.

Sheri

Chakras Explained

2009-05-26T14:34:00.000-07:00

When our upper and lower chakras are connected by the loving energy of the heart, we are freed from the divisive power of labels. There is no more us and them, good and bad, right and wrong; there is only the oneness of our connection to our source and everything else in the cosmos.

In Eastern Philosophy, primarily Hindu, it's believed that we have seven energy systems in our bodies called chakras. More and more people, however, are being awakened to these energy centers like I have been, so it isn't just associated with Hindus any longer. The first chakra is at the base of our tail bone, the 2nd is right below our belly button, 3rd solar plexus, 4th the heart, 5th the throat, 6th the center of the forehead and 7th at the crown of the head. Each have a different color and vibration associated with them. They are the colors of the rainbow starting with red at #1. The bottom 3 give us grounding and the ability to live as mortals on the planet. They connect us to the earth, give us the desire to have power, create and procreate, earn a living, and mingle with man. They also cause the baser instincts like pride, greed, jealousy, hatred and fear. The center chakra at the heart connects the lower and upper chakras. The upper chakras give us the ability to connect with our inner soul, which is pure and perfect, and ultimately our source, our creator, God. The Hindu belief is that when we come to earth our lower chakras are activated to help us adjust to mortal life. But as our search for meaning develops, and if we become engaged in a search for God we begin, mainly through prayer and meditation, to activate the upper chakras, which helps us commune directly with our source. This is what the great sages and mystics have been doing for thousands of years.

When our heart chakra becomes engaged a transformation occurs like no other. We feel the connection that exists between us and all living things on the planet and we realize our unity and wholeness. We feel the unwavering emotion of love and it transcends all of the negative emotions that exist. That in turn helps us do the inner work which activates the top 2 chakras, and when that occurs we have moments of complete divine connection to God.

Most people on the planet are ruled by the bottom 3 chakras. Although many are engaged in religious actions, they still remain grounded to the earth plane by way of need for power, greed and pride. The more we let go of the need to control, to gain power or attain wealth, the more our direct connection to our creator opens up. Once we really feel His unconditional love for us, the need or desire for sin slips away and our love for all of humanity takes over and becomes our guiding force.

When I say unconditional love, I'm referring to it as a verb. However, the action comes from within each of us and doesn't even need to be visible to the outside world. We don't need to change the punitive actions set up to punish those who break the law, or are a danger to themselves or society, it's simply a change within us which radiates love and joy to all, free of judgment and fear. When we make that change within ourselves we transform the world around us, literally. The same is true when we feel anger, hostility, fear, jealousy, hatred. Those emotions transform our world to reflect those very emotions back to us. Life is a mirror of our inner world.

When Christ said "The Kingdom of Heaven is Within you" he meant it literally. When enough people are able to make this one simple change within themselves of extending pure unconditional love directly from their hearts with no thought of judgment attached to it, the world will be transformed and become heaven. Some who have achieved enlightenment already see the world as heaven, their outer world reflects their inner peace based in God's love. But most are still projecting a world based on their own inner fears. When we make the journey from our 1st chakra to the 7th we will have communion directly with God, and the planet will find peace.The Hindus call this the marriage between Shakti and Shiva.

Why is Denying Same-Sex Marriage Egotistical?

2009-05-16T17:43:00.000-07:00

This is an article I wrote that is currently ranked #1 on the writer's Website, Helium.com.

As children, we all go through a phase where it's difficult to share our toys. We are even less likely to share with someone we don't know. Our little developing ego says "this is mine and someone else may ruin it, especially a stranger who I don't understand" Fear tells us that relinquishing the desired object may put it in harms way. Most of us eventually outgrow that selfish phase as we begin to understand that when we share, we all benefit and we arrive at the conclusion that our ego is often a master manipulator with only selfish intent.

The political attempt by right-wing conservatives to protect marriage by denying equality to gay couples proves that some people simply never grew up. This rabid attempt to somehow try and protect traditional values by denying same-sex couples equal rights has sent a rift of contention between brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, friends and clergy with no one winning anything of value, and many losing the peace that once existed within families and communities. It appears that those who have launched this all-out attack never learned the basic premise of the advice from the Master Jesus Christ: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and Love your neighbor as yourself. The piety and self-righteousness required to be involved in this blatant discrimination seems to me to be the ultimate example of egotism. And yet, those trying to hoard marriage for themselves are supposed to be the religious ones, the ones who have the greatest connection to the Master who spoke those words.

Why is it then that they have found justification to selfishly monopolize the word marriage for themselves, while launching an all-out attack on tax paying and law abiding citizens who simply want to be treated as equal in the eyes of the law and society? My fight as a straight woman for equality has uncovered the most irrational and twisted ideology by those purporting to protect traditional values. What they don't seem to get is that the side-affect of their actions has serious and hurtful consequences, and in reality, their victory helps no one. So what's the real purpose behind this divisive legislation?

For that answer you have to dig deep into the spell that religion has some followers under. When our beliefs are not scrutinized and we simply accept without getting some kind of empirical evidence to support them, we are in danger of following blindly and arriving at our conclusions (what we believe to be true) based on a faulty formula. If we are told by those we are following what the formula is for arriving at truth, and we never question that, how do we really know it's the truth? And those keeping us in the dark often have an agenda that serves to create a survival of the fittest environment with only those sharing the same ideologies being supported - all others are being cast to the wind.

Truth has a path in the here and now and can be arrived at through critical thinking and through the process of elimination. If we don't question or research our own set of beliefs and simply accept them as gospel, it's highly possible that we are missing an entire universe which could bring greater joy and abundance to us than we ever thought possible. But don't take my word for it, test this idea for yourselves.

Allowing same-gender couples the right to legally marry is a win-win situation. There is no evidence anywhere to suggest that the marriage of same-sex couples will hurt anything or anyone. In fact, if you look throughout history the greatest atrocities known to man occurred because of selfishness and intolerance toward those who were different or didn't agree with the majority, i.e. the crusades, the holocaust, the witch trials, slavery, women's suffrage, etc. In contrast, where gay marriage is supported and their families are honored, the entire community thrives

As our society works through this current battle of whether or not to allow same-sex couples the right to legally marry, I hope it becomes apparent to more of those who have found themselves on the wrong side of history, that it's time to grow up and share marriage. Doing so will bring about a new found peace and will usher in the next step in the evolution of our society. It will raise our consciousness closer to that of the great Masters who taught nothing but love and compassion. For the greatest healing that can occur within each of us is when we feel loved and respected by others. This divisive path of excluding and attacking the gay community is creating a state of chaos and darkness which serves to keep us blind. Only through tolerance for those whose beliefs differ from our own can we arrive at a more peaceful planet where the famous words from the declaration of Independence are honored: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

July 5th

2009-05-01T14:40:00.000-07:00